I was planning on live-blogging the Globes on Sunday night. Then out of nowhere, I got a migraine. So, I couldn’t exactly blog.

Then on Monday, I had a lot of homework. Finals are coming up. Man, it’s like the School don’t know the Oscars are this week.

But, I’m here now.

First, why does the HFPA insist on bringing back Ricky Gervais? I normally don’t care that much about the hosts of these award shows, but Gervais was AWFUL. The man can do some funny comedy, but the HFPA is clearly the wrong place for him.

By the way, I kept telling my parents that Rami Malek played a robot in Mr. Robot and was rather dismayed when I found out he does not.

But here are the films that won.

BEST PICTURE (DRAMA) – The Revenant

I saw The Revenant recently, and a review will be going up shortly. Basically, I think it was the weakest of the nominees. I guess this is the HFPA making up for not giving Birdman the win last year, but I hope this doesn’t mean anything…

BEST ACTOR (DRAMA) – Leonardo DiCaprio

I love how both our Best Actor and Best Actress frontrunner both play characters that suffer so much more than the other contenders.

BEST ACTRESS (DRAMA) – Brie Larson

Off to win the Oscar and prove the prediction I made back in March!

BEST PICTURE (COMEDY) – The Martian

The first sign that The Big Short might be weaker than we think.

BEST ACTOR (COMEDY) – Matt Damon for The Martian

Not a huge shocker.

BEST ACTRESS (COMEDY) – Jennifer Lawrence for Joy

Every single time JLaw teams up with David O’Russell, it always results in her winning a Golden Globe. Impressive.

BEST DIRECTOR – Alejandro G. Inarritu for The Revenant

Like Winslet, Inarritu seems to be the only sure thing to get nominated.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR – Sylvester Stallone for Creed

No idea what will happen here. This category is so confusing.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS – Kate Winslet for Steve Jobs

Everyone was shocked by this, including Kate herself. A lot of it depends on what category Mara and Vikander end up in, but could Winslet end up as a dark horse winner?

BEST SCREENPLAY – Steve Jobs

Shocker. The HFPA must have really loved the film.

BEST ORIGINAL SCORE – The Hateful Eight

Awful speech by Tarantino. I think we may have our winner here.

BEST ORIGINAL SONG – “Writing’s On The Wall” from Spectre

Everyone says that this is one of the weaker Bond songs. But everyone also says that this is a weak year for Original Song.

BEST ANIMATED FILM – Inside Out
BEST FOREIGN FILM – Son Of Saul

I’m pretty sure everyone saw these two wins coming.

And as for the DGA…

Alejandro Iñarritu
Tom McCarthy
Adam McKay
George Miller
Ridley Scott

Haynes, Spielberg, and Abrahamson missed.

I’m not sure what percentage of these make it at the Oscars.

So, there you have it, The Globes and the DGA.

Let’s all pretend like this means something.